Shara Freeman Hoefel is Assistant Head for External Relations at the Francis Parker School in San Diego, California. She joined the school in 2013 after working in Boston and New York City for Cornell University, Fordham Law School, and the Chapin School. She serves as Chair of CASE’s School Advancement Institute.

How did you get into advancement?

Growing up, I played travel softball. To be able to travel, we had to fundraise. I come from a small town in Massachusetts near Worcester. My teammates and I gathered in uniform at busy street intersections to collect donations, explaining that we were raising money to travel to the national tournament in Indiana. I sold wrapping paper, candy, and pizza to raise money to be able to play softball.

Then in college, I played ball for Cornell University. We had the traditional phone-a-thon with 25 landline phones and donor pledge sheets. The softball program at Cornell was a young program at the time. We didn’t have alumni who played the sport so we were basically cold-calling. I had to explain softball and the program before I could even ask them for money. I enjoyed that opportunity to make the case for our sport and our team, and to build relationships around that. 

After I graduated, when a sorority sister told me about a position in alumni relations and development for Cornell in the regional Boston office, I didn’t hesitate. I attribute my career in advancement to a combination of good fortune and a knack for making connections around a mission-driven cause. And now 20 years in, I continue to love this profession. I like to describe us as changemakers. We build connections that allow us to bring in amazing investments that change organizations and lives.

How did you go from working in higher education to independent schools? 

I loved my university work. What has pulled me to and kept me in schools is getting close to the action. Our meetings include everyone who works in development at the school. We all touch alumni relations, advancement services, major gifts, campaigns, communications—all of it. In a larger shop, you don’t get as close to all the operations. I’ve done every job and hired every job. When you are growing an office as a manager, you can really understand what you are asking others to do.

What do you find most rewarding about your work at the Francis Parker School?

It's a big decision to send your child to an independent school. Every year as a leadership team, we ask ourselves, “Are we delivering the best product for our families?” The answer to that came through loud and clear during COVID. We’d never had a shake up like that, but we came back stronger. We have a ton of integrity, we are mission focused, we believe in this place, and we have great leadership, donors, and families.

I’m so proud that we continue to grow. In 2019, we opened the Student Life Center with $6.5 million from 430 donors. We are now in the middle of construction for that Student Life Center to include an athletic complex and aquatic center with more funding secured from dedicated alumni and families.

It's not about the biggest gifts all the time. The most important work we do is stewardship. We nurture transformational giving. We have a handful of scholarship donors who have stayed with their students throughout the educational journey, including college. It’s those long-term relationships with donors, those moments that we live for.

What do you see as the top challenge facing school advancement?

The number one thing we strive for is to move from a transaction (this person makes a gift because they expect something) to transformational giving (do you believe in our mission?). What the political environment does now is default us back to the transaction. That’s hard. It’s not the place you want to be if you have big aspirations. When it comes to a crisis or politics, often those are circumstances you can’t control.  

So to use a San Diego term, you ride the wave. You stick to the mission, and you stick to who you are. But you have to do that with an open mind because the world changes so quickly, especially in recent years. It feels like you recover from one thing, and then another hits. So you shift to address the times—like we did during COVID—while always remembering you are there to serve the students and deliver on your mission. And when you’ve developed relationships with donors based on trust and integrity, that’s easier to do.  

You spent your early career on the East Coast in Boston and New York, what do you enjoy about San Diego?

Every day is summer in San Diego. What I’m learning and loving about the West Coast is this deep sense of living life to its fullest, and at a slower pace. I'm that person who can go a million miles a minute. People joke that I am Shara 2.0 here, I’m learning to slow down. When it comes to fundraising, you may have your own timeline for when you want to get things done. But here, no matter what your timeline is, it most likely does not line up with the donor’s. To go fast here is to actually go slow, which is the antithesis of who I am, but I’m learning to appreciate that. You have to embrace the pace. It’s 75 degrees outside and 3:00 in the afternoon and everyone is gone for the day. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a deep dedication to the value of education. It just means the surf’s up!

You serve as Chair of CASE’s School Advancement Institute. Tell us about that. 

For those who are new to independent schools, we provide a detailed curriculum to understand advancement in the context of the community and the environment. One of the reasons I love the institute so much is we have the fantasy football league of faculty members. We all come from schools so we understand how to build and deliver on a curriculum, breadth and depth of content, and clear learning objectives. We start online and then just prior to CASE-NAIS (the 2024 conference is Jan. 21 - 23 in Austin, Texas, U.S.) we meet in person for an intensive program, and then we finish online. This is a continuum of learning using research, real-life examples, and hands-on work. As for my involvement, I just love CASE, its programs, and the community. Any time you can volunteer with CASE, it’s a great opportunity for growth.

What is the best advice you’ve received and the best you’ve given? 

Believe it or not, my favorite advice—and I quote it often—comes from superstar Pitbull at the start of his song “Feel This Moment”: When you ask for money you get advice. When you ask for advice, you get money twice. 

And my advice to others who work in advancement is to take time to understand your relationship with money before you can ask others to invest in your institution. When you talk with a donor openly about how their monetary investment can make a difference, it can never be about you. I’ve heard colleagues say, “If I had that much money, I would do something different with it. I would put it toward homelessness.” But if you can put your thoughts and feelings aside—whether it be envy or disagreement—you can do amazing things in this profession.